Life as a Single Person

Here I am at my 3 year divorce anniversary!! Praise God I am still Happy & Single! I really enjoy the time that I have to contemplate my life serving God and serving my family without a complicated emotional relationship.

Life is great! I love my grandchildren and children of which I now have 2 new additions since my last post. I have a new grandson and granddaughter. Pictured at the right with Keely & Mattix, Katie & Isabella. They are incredible.
Up to eight grand kids now, I love them each and every one. This is our Easter pictures with outfits I have made for each of the kids. They were not liking having to pose with eggs waiting to be found.

I have starting sewing again and creating patterns and I love fabric! I have a whole new outlook on life. I gave up on my hobbies and things I enjoyed in my past and used all my creative talents, energies on fighting to survive emotionally.

The worst is behind me now. Recovering from such a life altering change is slow and sometimes painful but it will pass. Just like your birthing pains each one brings you closer to it being over.

There are challenges in all stages of life. Finances, health, career, Children, Family any area can suddenly present a "ball out of left field" so to speak. You just take it and realize it is an opportunity to learn something or to help someone else to grow.

Looking ahead and being content with where you are and what you have is KEY to being happy! Don't get contentment and complacency confused.

Contentment is being at peace with what you have and where you are while being thankful and appreciative of what God has given you ....or not given you.  In the in interim you are expecting for greater things in your life while serving God with all your heart. Greater things could mean, growing spiritually, in relationships with family or co-workers or church members, receiving an opportunity to go outside your comfort zone to share or serve in a whole new area of life.  Do not be anxious for anything, but you can have expectancy!!!!

Complacency is an excuse to not progress or just not wanting to move on and out of the muck and mire! Sitting still is going backwards, like riding a bike you can slow pedal and keep going ahead but quit pedaling and you will stop and fall off.  You have to keep moving and complacency does not give room to movement!!

Find something that inspires you. If it is taking a walk to clear your head or just google an idea you have to see if you can expand with other people's ideas. Go talk with a neighbor in need or bake a cake for someone for no reason!  Volunteer at church or community program. Do something!!!
As you do for others you will see an improvement of your self image and a sense of peace within yourself.  Also I have seen things happen for myself in serving others, God will bless those who are a blessing to others.  It is a biblical principle, and the Word cannot fail!!!

Hopefully I can write again soon. Have to get a pattern made. Trying something new for the grand kids.

When do you give up on marriage?

After a 25 year marriage, of which was mostly disappointing, I got a divorce. Several times throughout the marriage I contemplated divorce. It is not an easy decision. Knowing it is over can be bittersweet. Realizing that you have the freedom to move on can be very exciting but actually initiating that movement forward is painful and terrifying. When children are involved it becomes very complicated. Although my children were young adults they still went through some difficult times. My youngest at 14 had the hardest time with the whole ordeal even though she knew it was for the best.
The pain of staying has got to outweigh the pain of moving on. If you are able to overlook the pain and stay in it and exist, then you can still make something within the marriage work. If however, the pain is so great that you cannot breath deep enough to exhale all the toxic waste the marriage has deposited in your soul then run to the nearest attorney's office and file.
I am not an advocate for divorce, I am an advocate for life and when your life is just merely existing from one argument to the next or one disappointment to the next, you are not living. Life is too short and can be shortened even more from the emotional poison ingested in a toxic marriage.
Renew your spirit and soul by recognizing the potential of freedom. This is encouraged only after you have given all you have to try to rescue your marriage. If your partner does not participate on some level, or agree to counseling and is not supporting some interest in changing the situation then you need to consider your options.
Intrespection and reflection on the whole matter is critical. Look at it from all angles. Leaving is hard and learning to live alone again is a whole new journey and challenge in itself. Take time to evaluate who you are and what you expect from a mate. DO NOT JUMP INTO ANOTHER RELATIONSHIP!!! You have to know who you are to know who you want!!!